Historically, economically and socially, men are the workers and women are the child care providers. Foster Wales Conwy want to promote our ‘Men Who Care’ and break down misconceptions of foster carers.
Child care and fostering has long been viewed as the remit of women. As society evolves and gender roles shift significantly, it’s still often felt the role of ‘parent’ is assumed to be that of a women. Even in the cases when men are joint Foster Carers with their partners, they report to feeling slightly overlooked in the process and feel marginalised at events and in training, which they feel may be geared towards woman. Viewed as the secondary foster carer, with the primary care-giver being the female in the relationship.
Liam, Andrew and Chris, share their reasons and experiences of becoming foster carers with Foster Wales Conwy.
“It was always something I have thought about doing. As I got older and life got to the right place I started to think about it again. So, I got the ball rolling to see what our options were and next thing we started fostering. It has always been something that I have wanted to do!“ – Liam
“I started looking into fostering because my daughter had a friend who was in the care of the local authority. I got a bit inquisitive to what you had to do to become a foster carer. We put in our application to foster with Foster Wales Conwy, and the rest is history really. We have now been fostering for 10 years.“ – Andrew
Research shows men who would like to foster have shared responses from friends and family who don’t recognise or understand the reason they would want to become a foster carer. This might be as they don’t recognise the impact it can make or accept the benefits of a man being emotionally invested in the well-being of a child or young person who is in the care of their local authority. Thousands of men are foster carers in the UK, either as part of a couple or as single carers. Yet many men are deterred from becoming foster carers, and men are often considered not to want to work with children.
“Just give fostering a chance. I came in to it with very little knowledge and now I have an A-Z on why I choose to foster and why I will continue to foster. It is good to see the children smile and laugh. They might have been in a bad place and seeing a smile or giggle is a big thing to us, it is a great feeling!” – Andrew
a community of caring individuals
Foster Wales Conwy want to promote the role of men in the Foster Care system as being essential. The success of foster care service relies on a community of essential individuals, regardless of gender. While it may at times feel overlooked, the significance of having a caring, honest, trustworthy man in the life of a child or young person is invaluable.
“You’re just there as a positive role model.“ – Liam
“If you asked them, a lot of children and young people don’t understand our role as the leading carer and wouldn’t know what you meant. You take them to school, pick them back up and then when you’re back at home they don’t really see the difference or understand the role.“ – Andrew
For many children in care living with a male foster carer will be their first positive experience of an adult male, giving them the chance to explore the formation of trusting relationships and having contact with men who understand their needs.
“We cared for a 4 and 6 year old for a weekend a month, for over 3 years. The children returned to birth family, and didn’t need us anymore. At first, it was upsetting that we might not see them again. But then you think ‘no, we’ve actually done our job now’. And that is what it is about, giving them that chance.“ – Chris
“Watching them achieve goals they have set out. It is such a rewarding factor knowing you have been able to assist in the littlest, or biggest way possible.“ – Liam
positive role models
Foster Wales Conwy are open to recruit all individuals. Regardless of sex, age, marital status, sexual orientation, race or religious beliefs. Foster Wales Conwy are calling for any individual (or partnership) who feels driven and dedicated to making a difference to the life, the wellbeing, and the future prospects of a child or young person within Conwy County Borough Council.
As numbers of children needing a foster home increase year on year, it is important that we can support them in finding a stable and secure home for however long they need it. Whether they are welcomed into the home of a single male foster carer, a married couple, a cohabiting couple; the present of caring positive role models is key to a child and young person.
“I would say enquire. Don’t be afraid to do so, it’s not daunting and scary. Fostering is fun, and teaches you a lot about yourself too.“ – Liam
If you are interested in becoming a foster carer with your local authority in Conwy, contact your Foster Wales Conwy team on 01493 576 350 or complete the contact form below and we will get back to you shortly.
